Day 43: Personal Development By Way of Slowing Down

After I wrote my article for SFWA.org about my hunt for the value of social media, I realized that I’ve reached a new “phase” in my experiment.

Whether it’s a side effect of not being plugged in twenty-four seven or not, my habits have slowed down considerably. It’s not just caffeine consumption; I’m processing information more slowly and thoroughly than I have in the past six months. After a fashion, this makes complete sense to me. Several studies have pointed out how the web changes not only the way we think, but rewires our brains. For example, you can read this article dubbed Author Nicholas Carr: The Web Shatters Focus, Rewires our Brains. Or check out Does the Internet Change the Way We Think? on Newsweek, where a neuroscientist makes the claim that it doesn’t.

Dealing with what I have been, I would argue that it absolutely has an impact on the way that I think and process information. Typical habits and personality quirks aside, what I suppose is this: because I’m not being bombarded with data point after data point, my mental response time has been adjusting to the lack of information I come across in a day. For the past two weeks, especially after being taken down with a nasty cold, my inertia has slowed.

If you’re keeping up with the analogies I’ve been giving, I’ve mentioned how it feels like I’ve been a student in a school of fish swimming this way and that, in perpetual motion. When I left the school, I headed toward the bottom of the ocean. At first, all I could see is a reef of coral because that was my destination. Then, I literally touched the sea floor and slowed to a halt.

Mind you, I’m not the type of person that can handle just “sitting still” for too long. At the bottom, though, I experienced something I haven’t in a long, long time — silence. Sheer, unadulterated, quiet. Then what? I can’t just sit there and wait until this experiment is over with. Right? Right. My thinking, is that in order for me to function more quickly, I either have to consume or process information more quickly, too. For me, the way to do that, is to become a student once again. To learn. To deliberately choose what I want to know, enhance or revisit.

For the past couple of years, there’s been a number of “personal development” type projects and initiatives I’ve always wanted to do but never got around to doing. Volunteer work. Revisiting my graphic design and layout skills. Running a 5K. (I have a long list.) In the past, the challenge I had, was that I was looking at these experiences from the perspective (or the visualization) that they were already done. So the progress from Point A to Point B (a.k.a. “the journey”) was lost in my expectations for constant progress. While the internet isn’t responsible for my demands (or expectations) of immediacy, I certainly believe it contributed to it. This is part of our culture — get it now. And in my mind, that’s not necessarily a good thing. We admire the artist who can paint an incredible portrait, but we don’t see the hours of practice. The same is true with just about any other creative talent out there — including writing. In a way, I feel talent and ingenuity have turned into thirty-second novelties. To be an expert at anything, takes time and experience. You can read the information and obtain substitute programs that’ll replicate certain tasks, but that’s not the same thing as doing it yourself.

What getting offline has done to my thought processes, is slow them down to the point where my mind cleared. Tabula rasa. Blank slate. By slowing down, I was able to get back to the basics in a valuable, meaningful way. Instead of submitting every short story I write, I’m playing around with techniques in a story I don’t intend to sell. Same goes for just about everything else I’m doing, too. Walk for fitness before run. Learn new jewelry-making techniques by focusing on basic designs before creating the ones I want. Etc. Etc.

Getting back to the “bottom of the ocean” analogy, I floated down onto the sea floor and stopped. Then, I realized I could go in any direction I wanted to, as opposed to following and connecting with the crowd. (In this case, quite literally. For to engage socially, you have to use the tools everyone else is using, too.) Once I clearly identified the areas I wanted to develop, then I started over from the beginning and am building momentum to create and do some really fun things. I’ll be showing you some of those projects over the next couple of weeks, too.

Now that I’ve got forward momentum on the personal development aspects, my next step is to speed up my productivity and get back to where it used to be. For that? I’m going to turn back to the clock and start building in some routines.

In the end, what’s happened here is a complete ideological shift by way of a slower thought process. Because I no longer feel compelled to share my knowledge or participate in a social network, I’m not proving or professing my expertise (either consciously or subconsciously). The end result of not doing that anymore, is that my focus is on development to increase my skills and my talents. The silence and sheer lack of social pressure (whether perceived or not) allows me to do that without fear, without time constraints. If I screw up, who cares? If I fall down, I get back up. If I do something amazing? I don’t have to show the “one awesome thing” right away. Instead, I’m going to work towards several awesome things. With the way my creative energy has exploded, I’m already well on my way to doing just that.

Writing the Future, the Slow Creep of Ages

My friend (and incorrigible Scrabble player) Maurice Broaddus and I had a long conversation last year about setting goals. One thing that he tries to do is have twelve short stories out in the wilds. Good idea! I was up to half a dozen, but right now I’m back down to three, since the others got picked up by various publishers.

Two of those three are set in a far-flung future that was going to be a game. (That’s another story…) Anyway, this setting was developed about ten years ago. To create it, I took three basic elements: economy, politics, and overpopulation and spun them out about five hundred years into the future. For some of the physical setting elements to make sense, the time period is noted 1,000 years ahead.

Here’s what I predicted back then:

+ The Republican Party will splinter, creating new political groups. One portion will be based on a platform for gun rights and will be funded by the NRA. The other, a religious-based group with a heavy emphasis on Christian fundamentalism.

+ Credit card companies will collapse. Due to poor economic conditions, more people will rely on credit cards to survive. Unfortunately, their combined inability to pay these bills will result in a massive institutional collapse. This has a permanent effect on the economy and credit cards are no longer issued to most individuals.

+ Indentured servitude will return, replacing minimum-wage jobs. To erase debt and ease the financial devastation caused by massive debt, some corporations will offer indentured servitude in exchange for a clean slate.

+ Corporations will emerge as families. Instead of having a corporation that you work for, bills to pay, housing to find, etc. My characters have campuses they live on. Everything is provided for them as long as they are loyal to the corporation. It’s a skilled worker’s best chance at having a decent life.

+ Government will fracture into city-states. Five hundred years from now, the expansion of cities and the problems they deal with will be handled moreso on a local than a national level. My characters live in, for lack of a better explanation, micro-countries. While the government is still present, they occupy three spaces at that time instead of one in D.C. They’re in Chicago and L.A. specifically. Part of the reason why these centers exist, is because after a while our Federation of States begins to creep into Canada and parts of Mexico.

+ We ration. Everything. Overpopulation is a drain on all our resources, so goods–including water, basic foodstuffs, clothing, etc.–are not readily available. There is a very visible division between the rich and the poor. No middle class. No lower class. In most places, either you have or you don’t. Over ninety-five percent of the population has nothing. As as result, we do some interesting things to try to survive and help one another.

For this world, many countries degrade through a series of events and factors that we do not work together to prevent. Um, yeah… I did make predictions for multiple countries… The two that I focused heavily on were Russia, due to the huge find they’ll one day discover beneath Siberia, and China.

Now, this is fiction. None of these things may happen, but I feel that they could. Hence, as a writer, I feel I can provide a more realistic setting that you can really relate to. Here, there is no apocalypse. Just the slow creep of time and the aggregation of multiple events.

Ask Yourself the Tough Questions

Years ago, when I first started writing, I was more worried about seeing my name in print than I was about getting paid for my work. So, like many other “new” authors, I threw just about everything against the wall while I fulfilled my real life obligations. Would a part-time job pay my rent while I wrote at night? What about a full-time job as a writer? Or how about a volunteer position where I can write to build up my resume? What shortcuts did I need to take to see my name in print?

Red Question Mark | Used from Stock.xchngIf you’ve ever been in the “I need to pay rent and I don’t like junk food” place that I’ve been in before, you’ve probably had these same discussions with yourself. Then, when any and all forms of writing assignments start piling in, you get excited because dammit, you’re a writer. Did it matter you just worked for three weeks on an article and didn’t get paid for it? Did it matter you don’t own the rights to what you just wrote? No. What mattered is that you wrote and got published, so you start to let a lot of things slide.

Then, at some point, you wake up and you smell burnt coffee. You get burned. Badly. Someone republishes your work and scrapes your name off the credits and expects you to shove your angst under the rug. A partner manages to “forget” you signed a contract and drops off the face of the planet, so you never get paid for weeks of effort. The story you handed in is different from the story that got published and you were never notified. An editor lost your manuscript. The pitch you handed in years ago is now a multimillion dollar book and no one believes it was your idea. The list of crimes against writers goes on and on and on.

Here’s a tough question for you: Would you quit a job if your boss was being an asshole? Then why on earth would you allow yourself or your work to be treated like crap?

Quite frankly, the cost of making bad decisions is a lot higher than you might think because writers are not paid according to the time and knowledge required for a polished manuscript. Not only is your name and your reputation attached to whatever it is that you’re doing, the time that you spend dealing with crappy projects means that you’re losing money because you’re spending less time on the projects that have a better chance of succeeding. When you’re new to writing, it’s great to experiment so you can find out where your strengths and weaknesses are. But what happens when you’re no longer new? Have you thought about turning down projects you don’t want?

Now, some of you might think that there should be some sort of database out there to pinpoint who the assholes are. However, that is not a professional thing to do because while you may have had a crappy experience with one publisher, a different writer may have had a great one. Yes, patterns can develop, but every situation is usually different because there are two sides to every story. You may be pissed off that you didn’t get paid, but the company could have been filing for bankruptcy, experienced personnel changes or has a policy against paying for delivered work past the deadline you were supposed to meet. Remember, too, there are cases where bad things happen not because a publisher is an evil bastard, but because you’ve experienced a breakdown in your communication with them. That last bit is part of the reason why I believe good, two-way communication is so essential to any writer’s overall success.

So what happens when you get burned? Well, first you have to rant about it in private. (Yes, you really do!) While you’re at it, order a very large margarita, go for a run or play a game. Then, at some point you have to learn when to cut your losses and move on.

In my mind, I don’t believe enough writers ask themselves why they are working on projects that they’ve committed themselves to. To those of you who haven’t gotten paid for your work yet, I understand what you’re going through. You’re hungry to get their name out there. I get that. I really, really do. If you are happy blogging or writing fan fiction and now you’ve got a ton of readers then that’s great! Are you happy writing for free or do you want your readers to pay you? Have you ever asked yourself how much you want to get paid? Are you being realistic with those expectations? Do you know what writing you can get paid for versus what writing you can’t?

The quick response to these types of questions is to say something like, “Well, so-and-so author ended up making millions by bucking the traditional system this way…” While that is true, those experiences are not typical for most writers. What I’m trying to convey in this post, are the questions the rest of us need to ask ourselves. Lightning can strike, but I wouldn’t bank my career on it. Would you?

Do Not Be Afraid To Make a Mistake

Every day, I read headline after headline about all the things writers “should” be doing. From things you shouldn’t do or say in a query letter to the various mistakes you can make when you’re trying to sell your books, I can certainly see how anyone might feel overwhelmed.

Here’s the thing: most people online provide advice as a way to share what they know (or in some cases, what they don’t). I recently overheard a quote that proclaimed “unsolicited advice is self-serving.” Yeah, that’s really true, but without that “unsolicited advice” no one, including me, would have a lot of material to blog about.

Just because there is all this advice out there, doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t be afraid to make a mistake. I believe that the number one reason that many people stop writing or never submit is because they are paralyzed with fear. Paralyzed by it because someone out there is always better, faster, more connected or more visible than they are. So, if that writer makes a mistake, they feel like someone is going to find out about it and cross their name off the “I am a writer” list with a big, fat “X.”

If you want to write professionally, handling bad news and criticism in a way that doesn’t damage your soul for eternity pretty much comes with the territory. The only way you’re going to learn about this business is by getting out there and hoofing it. Yes, there’s a lot of conventional wisdom out there that is worth listening to, but that is up for you to figure out what’s meaningful to your career and what’s not. Your experience is going to be different than mine is, because you are a different person than I am. That doesn’t mean “you’re doing right” or “you’re doing it wrong.” If you find something that works for you? Great. If you fall flat on your face? Learn from it. Embrace it. Then? Get back up again.

For clarification purposes, please note that I do believe there’s a difference between reality and fantasy. Experienced authors make writing seem effortless, because they’ve got millions of words behind them. If you’re just starting out? You’ll probably need to focus on how to write rather than how to be a writer. In my experiences, writing isn’t about what you do on the first try, it’s a journey that you have to repeat over and over and over again. Yes, you’ll encounter bumps along the way, but who cares? I don’t measure my career by how many times I fall down, it’s about how many times I get back up. Of course, the irony of this blog post is not lost on me because that I’m telling you — flat out — not to worry about always making the “right” decision when it comes to your career. That certainly includes listening to anything I have to say. *smiles*

If you do one thing this week, I would like to encourage you to try something new. Have a hard look at a story you’re having a hard time selling, write something in a new genre, or give your manuscript to a brutal critic. Break out of your mold and be brave! BE BOLD! Become…a writer who isn’t afraid of making a mistake!

Marathon Wrap-Up and a Quick Look Ahead

First of all, marathoners — I owe you an apology. I had a summary post written (I really, really did) but somewhere in between plowing full steam ahead to 2010 and my WordPress updates I lost it. I’d like to share with you some closing thoughts on the Marathon.

For me, December was a kick start to re-focus my efforts on my fiction. While I didn’t accomplish as much as I would have liked, I did get a lot of filing done (phew!) and I was able to take enough of a breather to simplify the story. While every writer that I talked to got something different out of the marathon, for me the reminders were two-fold: one, it was a way to re-establish my routine and keep going and two, writers are not machines. No matter how strict of a schedule I might create, my personal life has to happen somewhere in between waking up and going to bed.

I hope that the December Writing Marathon inspired you to write. Regardless of what you learned, I feel very strongly about finding inspiration wherever you can find it, so if you have links to share with your fellow writers — post ‘em in the comments.

A Look Ahead

Fourth quarter really sucked. I mean, really sucked. I had several fiction opportunities and a major licensed property fall through (or be greatly post-poned) all within three months. Add other drama to the mix and it was a recipe for a very busy and very stressful couple of months. While I’m pretty realistic about rejections and the like, the sheer volume of “No, no, no’s” took its toll.

I don’t have any New Year’s Resolutions other than a simple motto: NO FEAR. What does that mean? Stay tuned and find out…

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